As many of you know I am having a huge charity birthday
party this Sunday and I’m super excited about it!!! Sunday is going to be a big
day for me because not only is it my birthday party but I am getting baptized!!
These last few weeks leading up to my party have been really
tough on me spiritually. I have felt this separation from God, I saw so much of
my old self coming back. This really had been getting to me. So I decided maybe
I shouldn’t get baptized cause you’re supposed to be with God to do that,
right? *spiritual warfare* lol. That was my thinking. But I found that just
because I wasn’t doing everything perfect God still loved me, we had a relationship,
and He still very much wanted me to get baptized. Satan must know something
good is going to happen because he has been trying so hard to mess with me!
We have so much work to do to prepare for my charity
birthday party I can’t even being putting my mind around everything. My family
and I have been mad men running around our house trying to get everything
cleaned, making lists of everything we need done, buying all the decorations
and food, finding the music, etc. The Beck’s household has been madness. Haha. But
I find that there is a lesson here and something I don’t want to miss through
all of this. See I don’t want to get so caught up in the things we have to do
to prepare that I miss the reason why I am doing all this. I feel we do this a
lot of times in life. Take time everyday to remember why you are doing
everything you’re doing!
For me I want my party to not be about me, or the people we
are helping, but about God. See He is the reason why I am doing all this.
Without God I wouldn’t be here. Without God I have no worth. I want God to
shine through my party, through me! I want Jesus to be shown!
During my party I don’t want to get caught up in all my
friends that are there, I want to get caught up in the amazing things God is
doing! The amazing things He is doing through me. I am humbled that the God of
the universe is using me to impact the people in Ethiopia and around the world.
Through my party I hope that God and I will come closer to each other.
I don’t care how much money I raise, because I know God will
provide all the funds He wants me to have. I don’t care how many people show
up. I care about my relationship with God and if I brought glory to His name. That
is my goal, that is my desire.
Happy Birthday in advance Kirsten! And it's great what you're doing. Afterall, James 1:27 says "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world". So excited for you! Oh and when you're "feeling" far from God, tell your feelings to take a hike. I feel that way sometimes, but I have come to learn that feelings are just that...feelings! It doesn't mean you're "bad". Some good old quality time spent in His presence usually does the trick. Again, super excited for you! Have lots of fun and may God be glorified above all!
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