Student becomes Teacher

In the past years, whenever I got anxiety attacks I would go talk to Dr. Burns -a psychologist.

If you haven't had a panic attack before I'll try to explain the feeling to you...

You can't stop moving. Your whole body won't stop shaking, no matter how hard you try to stop it. The feeling of fear takes over your whole body. Like a wave of darkness, is taking over you soul. There is no escape. You feel as though it will never stop. Your heart starts to pump- it pumps faster and you start fearing that you're having a heart attack. There is no escape. You feel like you're dieing- and as far as you know, you are dieing.

My anxiety has come back in the last week. Every night I have had an attack. But, it was different this time. Before I knew what was causing them, the triggers. But, this time, I had no triggers. It was as though it was happening and I couldn't control it. Like, God was wanting me to have them.

Come to find out, He did want me having them, because he knew what I was going to do- talk to Dr. Burns.

As I drove to his office, I knew in my mind that I was supposed to talk to him about Jesus. Do you know that feeling? I asked God to use me, and speak through me, to help him find Jesus. I know I can't change him, the only person that can change him is God!

He's a psychologist, so obviously he was asking me questions, trying to get me to think. But, I had already though about them, so answering them was easy. I'm not sure how I started the conversion but we started talking about Jesus. Last time I went, we talked about Jesus, and I found out he was a non-believer.

I started telling him the story about my grandmother. My grandmother was at work and feel off a ladder, broke her leg, then past out. She then appeared in what she explained as a “heavenly place”. She keep telling me how words can't describe it, but she did tell me “I felt 100% loved, 100% peace, 100% joy”. I told him this story, and noticed he didn’t believe a word I was saying. So I decided to tell him what God later did in my grandmother's life.

She got diagnosed with a terminal disease, she had a couple months to live. Unlike some people, she never asked God to heal her. You know why? She wanted to go back to that place she was at, heaven! But, I prayed, my family prayed. The next 3 days, my grandmother was completely healed!!!! The doctors had no explanation! When I told Dr. Burns this, I knew I got his attention.

I talked more on this subject. But, then I told him about the book “Heaven is for Real”. After I told Dr. Burns about the book, he looked at me and said last week he picked up that book, and it's been stuck in his head all week! He was amazed. Then I told him how I asked God, if my purpose for these anxiety was to talk to Dr. Burns, than there would be an opening today. Then he told me that he never has an opening.

Our talk turned into me asking him questions, instead of he asking me questions. I was teaching him, when he was supposed to be teaching me. Lol(:

I know this was one reason for my anxiety. There is always a purpose in everything! Dr. Burns wants me to e-mail him in a week, to see how I'm feeling. But, secretly I know why -he wants to know if God healed me. And you know what, I honestly believe he will get rid of my anxieties when he is done with my purposes to have them. That's reassuring, cause there is an end!